Sunday, November 8, 2009

Dating Persona
Johnathon:
The False Messiah
Deliberate Brutal Love Master (DBLM)

People believe in you, and then you send them to hell. Behold, the False Messiah.

You’re usually a very kind person, and conscientious, too. Socially, you’re a leader, and your friends and associates look up to you. In intimate relationships, you’re a capable, responsive, and experienced lover. Outside the box, however, you run into trouble.

Girls fall hard for you, but you’re much more ambivalent about them. The beginnings of your relationships are unusually intense, making it all the rougher on her when they end. At first, using all your accumulated tricks of the trade, you ladle on the affection. But once she’s all covered in soup, you withhold the true napkins of commitment. What’s that all about? We should’ve called you the False Waiter.

You’re looking for Love. But history tells us you struggle to settle down and accept it. There’s a deep streak of carnality within you. And while you’ll never be a predator, you’ll always fight the urge to roam free. You like to plan things out, so plan this: find someone who can indulge your selfish side, has a healthy sexual appetite, and doesn’t mind uncertainty.

Consider:
The Stiletto (DBSM)
The Peach (RGLM)
The Nymph (DBSD)

Always Avoid:
The Sonnet (DGLD)
The Window Shopper (RGLD)

Personality Defect
Johnathon:
Smartass
You are 71% Rational, 100% Extroverted, 71% Brutal, and 57% Arrogant.
You are the Smartass! You are rational, extroverted, brutal, and arrogant. In fact, you could very well be the anti-Christ, as you are almost the exact opposite of everything Jesus was supposed to be. While Jesus says love your enemy, you say love beating the crap out of your enemy. While Jesus raises the dead, you raise hell. While Jesus walks on water, you tend to sink. You probably consider people who are emotional and gentle to be big pussies who are obviously in lesser stature than you. You have many flaws, despite your seeming intelligence and cool-headedness. For instance, you aren't very nice. In fact, you're probably an asshole. And you are conceited and self-centered. Not only that, but you are very loud and vocal about all this, seeing as how you are extroverted. There is no better way to describe you than as a "smartass", I'm afraid. Perhaps just "ass" would do, too. But that's a little less literary and descriptive. At any rate, your main personality defect is the fact that you are self-centered, mean, uncaring, and brutally logical.

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